Children are usually obedient when they are with others, but when they are with their mothers, they are stubborn and spoiled. Many times, mothers are embarrassed by their children’s behavior such as screaming, crying, disobeying, etc. Why is there a phenomenon of children being spoiled when their mothers are around? How to overcome this spoiled behavior in children?

Mothers are helpless when they see their children being very obedient when they are around others, but as soon as they are around their mothers, they start to behave badly and show signs of being stubborn, difficult, whining, spoiled, always demanding to follow their mothers or even being aggressive towards their mothers. There is a reason why children become like this, not because they are special children. Please refer to the following article to learn about the phenomenon of children being spoiled when their mothers are around and how to overcome it.

Why are children spoiled when their mothers are around?

Here are the reasons why children are spoiled when their mothers are around:

Children feel safe when they are around their mothers

To children, their mothers are always a safe place to rely on in life. So children express more in front of their parents, especially their mothers because they feel more secure. You usually only give your true feelings to those you love. Children are the same. So if you wonder why children are spoiled when they have their mothers and behave well with everyone except you, the answer is because you have the privilege of being their mother.

Children show off more in front of their mothers because they feel safer when they are with them.

Children need their mothers to release their emotions

Because the brains of young children are not fully developed, it takes a lot of time for them to control their agitation. When children feel upset, worried, afraid of something or have just had a bad day at school and when they come home, the emotions or anger that they have for their mothers are just a way to help them release. After “releasing” their discomfort and frustration, the children behave cutely as usual.

Children want their mothers’ attention

Another reason why children act spoiled when their mothers are around is because they feel that there are other people competing with them for their mothers’ attention. These people can be brothers, sisters, pets or even their mothers’ work, making them feel that their mothers do not pay attention to them. Children do not like this and find ways to express this emotion.

Children know that their mother loves them

With children who are close to their mother and are cared for and loved by her, they know that their relationship with her is safe. Therefore, children feel that they can be stubborn, rebellious, disobedient and even cross the line. This is because their mother has a good relationship with them.

Children want something

Every act of whining, stubbornness, and tantrum of a child has a purpose behind it. Maybe the child wants the mother to meet a certain request. The child’s anger also means that the child is showing power to the mother and trying to manipulate. You should find a way to talk to the child to find out the child’s purpose and have a suitable way to handle it instead of stress and conflict.

A child’s whining may be because he wants his mother to meet a certain request.

Children’s dependence on their mothers causes many harmful effects

When children depend on their mothers too much, it will bring about some of the following negative things:

Children’s excessive dependence on their mothers can negatively affect their independence. This leads to children not being able to think independently and not being able to solve difficult problems, thus being unable to adapt to the social environment and life later on.

Moreover, this can make mothers upset and put pressure on them. Mothers have to take on the responsibility of raising children while also facing pressures at work and in life. If children always cling to their mothers, mothers will feel physically and mentally tired, which will negatively affect their work and relationship with their children.

How to overcome children who like to cling to their mothers?

It is normal for children to be spoiled when their mothers are around, it is their way of expressing their emotions and needs. To overcome this, mothers can apply the following methods:

Nurturing independence for children

To nurture independence for children in daily life, let them try to complete some simple tasks such as dressing themselves, personal hygiene, etc. This can help children gradually become less dependent on their mothers and build self-confidence and satisfaction with themselves. In addition, children can also adapt easily to new environments.

Care and love your children more

Mothers should spend more time with their children to meet their emotional needs and also as a way to build a better relationship with their children. Care is to regularly interact with children such as hugging, kissing, caressing, talking, etc. These affectionate gestures are not only a way for mothers to express their love but also a way for mothers to comfort, care for and take care of their children.

Children will feel more comfortable and their psychological state will also be more stable when they feel the love and care from their mothers. From there, children will be less dependent on their mothers and gradually become more confident when alone.

Mothers should spend more time with their children to meet their emotional needs.

Create a diverse social environment

To help your child gradually reduce clinging behavior, encourage your child to connect with other family members or relatives, so that your child can be exposed to many different people and environments.

Be patient and understanding

When your child clings to you, you need to be sympathetic and patient. Do not try to push your child aside or ignore his or her needs. On the contrary, you can gently tell your child that you are always there for him or her, creating safety and trust for him or her.

At the same time, you must also clearly understand your child’s psychological state and emotional needs in order to care for and fully support him or her.

Seek support

If you have tried many ways but your child’s clingy behavior is getting worse and worse, negatively affecting your normal life, you can consider seeking help from a psychologist to better adjust your child’s clingy behavior

Although young children often cling to their mothers and rarely to their fathers, this does not mean that fathers are not important in their child’s growth. Therefore, fathers should establish a close emotional bond with their children by actively participating in their daily care and upbringing. More importantly, parents should cooperate with each other in their child’s growth.

Parents should cooperate in the process of raising and caring for children.

In general, children who are clingy or clingy to their mothers are too dependent on their mothers and want to feel secure. Therefore, parents need to understand and respect their children’s needs, and also guide them to develop independence and self-confidence. From there, children can develop healthily and be able to face challenges and difficulties on their own in the future.